Tone

“What studies actually say is that I’ll begin to “accept” my mother’s death more quickly than I would have in the case of a sudden loss—possibly because I experienced what researchers call “anticipatory grief” while she was still alive. In the meantime, it sucks as much as any other death. You still feel like you’re pacing in the chilly dark outside a house with lit-up windows, wishing you could go inside. You feel clueless about the rules of shelter and solace in this new environment you’ve been exiled to.“

From “Dreaming of the Dead” (Same author as the hamlet one)

http://www.slate.com/id/2211257/entry/2213007/

There is also an interesting discussion on finding a metaphor for your dead loved one. The author of the article feels her mother very strongly in the wind. I have friends who are connected to their loved ones through the sea. Most people will recognise the idea immediately and say – oh yes – that’s the moment I heard the ocean/trees in the wind and realised they were still with me.

Jess was in the rain for me.